


Lost and Found

by Anonymous



Category: Kinnikuman Nisei | Ultimate Muscle
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Bittersweet Ending, Coming Out, Extramarital Affairs, M/M, Porn With Plot, Sexuality Crisis, implied break-up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-12
Updated: 2019-11-12
Packaged: 2021-01-30 18:35:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21432829
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Mantaro knew things could not work with Jacqueline.He turned to Mars for support and advice, only to realise what he wanted most was a man's touch.
Relationships: Kinniku Mantaro/Jacqueline Muscle, Kinniku Mantaro/Mars
Comments: 5
Kudos: 10
Collections: Anonymous





	Lost and Found

‘I can’t keep having this same argument!’

Mantaro paced back and forth. The harsh lights from above struck hard on her face, exaggerating the sharp lines and dulling the colours, and yet there was no missing the bloodshot eyes. A few tearstains marked trails down her cheeks, disturbing her mascara and foundation. He winced. It was a vast change from her laughter . . . her smiles . . . instead the only sounds were the choked sobs and rustling of tissues, as she dabbed at her eyes with trembling fingers.

He froze before the balcony, where his hands clenched and unclenched. The stars were the same stars as every night . . . the same constellations, the same galaxies . . . each one could be relied upon to always where it should, with an unchanging dependency. The sheets were creased beneath Jacqueline, as he sat hunched forward on the mattress. He leaned against the wall. A beam of moonlight fell through the garden and illuminated the flowers, where it slowly worked its way towards the palace, and fell on the marble balcony with a gentle touch.

_We could be happy . . . _

The photographs lined the walls of their bedroom . . . a record of a life shared together. He turned to see her clothes alongside his within the wardrobe, while the diary on their desk showed both their engagements, and the scent of her perfume mingled with his cologne, both tainted with the smell of sex and sweat. Mantaro sighed, as tears pricked at the corners of his eyes. He walked over to the bed. It creaked as he sat on the very edge, while the still warm sheets bundled around his upper legs, and he smoothed out the creased with palm of his cold hand.

‘It should be so easy,’ he whispered.

‘Then why isn’t it?’ Jacqueline asked. ‘I sometimes think I married a stranger. You know everything about me, but what do I know about you? Even the sex is one-sided! You won’t tell me what you like, won’t let me try anything new, and you don’t like penetrating me . . . sure, you give, but _I_ want to give, too! I want you to feel like how you make me feel . . .’

‘But I don’t _want_ you to reciprocate, I told you it’s all fine!’ Mantaro blushed. ‘Look, I don’t know, it’s complicated, but we’ve talked about it a thousand times . . . you can either accept it or leave me, but at this point those are our only two options, so . . . yeah . . .’

‘Oh, so I sacrifice again with no hint of compromise?’

‘I feel like our whole relationship is a set of compromises, Jacqueline! I’m _sick_ of compromises. I mean, are either of us fully happy when we both have to give up something to make the compromises work? You always forget how much I’m giving up, too . . .’

‘Like a fulfilling sex life? Like a spouse you seem to _like_?’Jacqueline shook her head. ‘I just don’t know what more I can _do_, Mantaro! Do you want me to change my hair or my outfits? You liked Rinko before me, right? Did she have something that I don’t? I know Ikemen would be excited to give me a makeover. Just tell me what to do and I’ll do it, Mantaro!’

‘You shouldn’t have to change for me!’

‘Well, clearly I’m not enough!’

Mantaro cried out. It was a strangled and broken sound, as he buried his hands into his tuft of hair, and he could only return to pacing, as his footsteps echoed out loud about the bedroom. They were muffled against the carpet, which was soft against the soles of his feet . . . a luxurious home, a beautiful wife, a good reputation . . . he had everything, and yet there he was pacing the bedroom with panted breaths and narrowed eyes. There was music from another floor of the palace, something soft and sweet and almost romantic, but it wasn’t enough . . .

‘I can’t take these guilt-trips,’ spat Mantaro.

He snatched at his tights from the floor, before wrenching them onto his legs. He dressed as quickly as he could, enveloping his body in the wrestling uniform he wore only a few years before in his heyday, and covered the scars that mapped his body . . . a map of his life. Jacqueline crawled back into bed. The sheets barely covered her, while shaping her curves to perfection, and they were beautiful like a work of art, but . . . he flinched and screwed shut his eyes, as he counted to ten and opened them once more. Jacqueline whispered:

‘Why won’t you just talk to me?’

‘I don’t want to talk,’ said Mantaro. ‘I just want some time alone, so I can process things and calm down, and talking about it – right now – is just going to dredge up all the crap and overwhelm me and all I want to do is forget! I’ll be fine. Just give me a few hours, okay? I just – I just need to work through it all in my head, okay? I just need time.’

‘So you don’t trust me to talk to me, is that it?’

‘Oh, for fuck’s sake -! Look, I can’t do this, I can’t! If I don’t tell you how I feel, you accuse me of being all hostile and secretive and stuff, but when I tell you . . . you just get all upset and freak out and then it’s all about you, and I have to comfort you even when I haven’t the strength.’

‘I’m not trying to make this about me! Don’t be so mean, Mantaro.’

‘Okay, so what happens now, then?’

He pressed his fingers into his eyes, until he saw sparks of colour. The rapid beating of his heart echoed out about the room . . . it drowned out all sounds, it pierced his mind . . . _pound, pound, pound_ . . . a scream buried itself in his throat, threatening to burst out. A lump formed in his throat, which he swallowed back with pain. It was too much. It would be so easy to live in denial, but she wouldn’t let him . . . the world wouldn’t let him . . . he spun around, vision distorted with tears, as he wrapped his arms around his torso and shrugged. Jacqueline hugged the sheets.

‘If I walk away to calm down now, I’m the dick.’ He sighed. ‘If I stick around, I have to deal with you being all sad and stuff and try to make you feel better, and I’m the one who’s going through a load of stuff and this only started as I said: “_I just don’t want to talk right now_”.’

‘Well, if you want to be alone, there’s no point me being here . . .’

‘Oh my God, _seriously_? How’d you want me to respond to that? I can either beg you to stay and it’s all about you, or I can say “not really” and you get super upset! Look, you’re hot and crazy awesome and super smart, so I don’t get where all this insecurity is coming from, but I just know that I can’t deal with it . . . you even got jealous of Mama and Kid!’

Jacqueline bolted upright. The sheets fell to her waist. He saw everything . . . the curve to her firm and large breasts, the porcelain white of her soft skin, and the long locks of hair that fell about her like a renaissance painting. He blushed and turned his head, while he pursed his lips and hugged at his arms with a firm hold. Mantaro rocked on the balls of his feet. Jacqueline’s chest heaved up and down with every broken cry, while her hand was clenched just above her heart, and Mantaro could only cover his ears with his hands, as she screamed out:

‘You show them more affection than me!’

‘My mother and best friend?’ A tear rolled down his cheek. ‘If I look at another girl, you ask if you’re not enough for me and what you need to change. If I say I’m not in the mood, you cry and say that it’s because I’m not that into you . . . I can’t . . . I can’t be your therapist . . .’

‘I never asked that of you,’ said Jacqueline. ‘You’re being unfair.’

‘Yeah, well . . . maybe I am . . .’

The music stopped. He tilted his head in search of the sound, but there was nothing but the cries from Jacqueline and the racing of his heart . . . _no, not now . . . _Mantaro stumbled over to the door, while his hand fumbled with the doorknob. The sweat of his hand slid on the metal. He fought to hold back the tears, as adrenaline shot through his veins. The world grew dark, while his head spun and a cold sweat broke over his skin, and he fought . . . he fought to open the door . . . until finally – with a heavy gasp of breath – it flung open and he could breathe again.

He slammed shut the door behind him. Mantaro collapsed back against the wood, as he slid down until buttocks touched upon the floor, and he threw back his head with enough force that a searing pain shot through his skull, as the tears fell fast and free down his face. He raised his callused hands to his face, where years of scars and marks stared back at him, and it was a far cry from soft and perfumed skin with no imperfections . . . Mantaro laughed through his tears.

‘Maybe I am . . .’

* * *

A cool breeze blew through the park. It caught at the bare skin of his arms, even as he wrapped them around the spandex of his uniform, and his hand – with a touch barely there – traced the pattern of the ‘KIN’ sign over his chest, while his feet kicked at the footpath. The stars above could barely be seen with the artificial lights of the Tokyo landscape, and Planet Kinniku was obscured from sight, nothing more than a lingering obligation in the back of his mind.

The trees rustled along the footpath, with a few streetlights casting strange and moving shadows across the grass and ground, and every so often – with pants and swishes of spandex – joggers would race by with small salutes or polite waves. A stone bench sat not far in the distance. It was part of a lookout point, with trees circling it with a strategic position, and the view of the park was a beautiful one, even in the darkness. Mantaro smiled. A familiar figure sat with legs parted and arms rested on knees, while they waited with infinite patience.

Mantaro slowly walked towards them. They loomed taller than any human, with hulking muscles making the most of the small space, and their long red hair cascaded down their back, making Mantaro blush to realise that he perhaps had a type . . . the soft locks fluttered in the breeze. He stopped a few feet away from them, where they turned their head with a smirk that made their eyes sparkle. They chuckled, before they patted a spot just beside them on the stone bench.

“So the rumours are true,” said Mars. “You’re back on Earth.”

The suit he wore clung to his muscles. It exaggerated them, much as the skin-tight dresses always exaggerated Jacqueline’s curves. It brought a blush to his cheeks . . . his eyes ran over the bulges of his biceps, the hint of a six-pack beneath the red shirt, and the thick legs that threatened to burst the stitches of his trousers. Mantaro awkwardly sat beside him, where he fidgeted from side to side in an attempt to hide his growing erection, as Mars asked in a low voice:

“Trouble in paradise?”

It was a rolling and gravelly rumble, something uniquely masculine. Warmth exuded from Mars, who sat so close that their skin was but an inch apart, and sparks of electricity ran through every nerve, as Mantaro instinctively angled closer with an audible swallow. He avoided direct eye-contact, while he gazed at the vast flowerbeds and sloping hills. The city sparkled in the distance. It glistened like a sky filled with stars, enough that it would have been a romantic spot had he been with a partner, but instead he could only fidget and ask with a broken tone:

“How’d you know that you were gay?”

“I ain’t gay,” said Mars.

“Well, how did you know you were bi, then?”

Mars spun around. He straddled the bench with muscular thighs, while his hands gripped at the edges of the stone with enough force that the veins bulged along his forearms, and Mantaro – with a dark blush – lowered his head to glance at the barely constrained member. Mars scoffed. He took Mantaro’s chin with a callused finger, where his thumb lightly brushed against parted lips, and forced his gaze back upright. Mars pulled back with a chuckle. Mantaro licked his lips out of instinct, as his heart raced and his breath came out in pants. Mars asked in a whisper:

“How’d _you_ know you were gay?”

“I . . . I don’t know . . . if I am gay. That’s that problem!”

“Well, you must have an idea, right?” Mars raised an eyebrow. “I mean, you ain’t going to be asking a loaded question like that, not unless you got a reason? I’m gonna be honest, though, as I ain’t never put you down as anything but straight, but it seems odd to me that you’d call me out here – in the middle of the night – over something over nothing if you thought you were straight.”

“It’s – It’s just complicated, okay? It’s complicated.”

“Yeah, well, sexuality is always complicated. It gets even more complicated when you got a fucking _wife_, though! How’d you end up in your early twenties and _not_ know whether you’re the pitcher or the hitter? Look, I ain’t judging, but it sounded like on the phone you were saying you thought you were . . . _gay_. Am I even the best guy to talk to about shit that real?”

“There’s no one else I’d trust,” whispered Mantaro. “Rinko or Ikemen would tell Jacqueline, and my parents would freak out that it’d mean I’d leave her, because they love her so much, and I don’t want to disappoint them by leaving someone they adore so much . . .”

“What about speaking to Kev?”

“He’s pretty much always known he was gay, right? Plus, he’s so happy with Warsman. I didn’t want for him to either say ‘stick it out’ or just ‘you’d know if you were’, because . . . it’s not helpful, you know? Kid is still sleeping around, so I think his advice would just be ‘get around and see what you like or don’t like’, but that’d mean cheating or breaking up, and . . .”

Tears pricked at his eyes. Mantaro turned around on the bench, so that he faced Mars face-to-face, but the face of the other man was obscured through the tears . . . blurred and distorted . . . Mantaro brought the back of his hand to his face, where he wiped back the moisture. The back of his mouth burned with bile, as he swallowed back a rising sickness. He had needs, but he also needed to be faithful . . . a lifetime of sacrifice that Jacqueline would never understand . . . through a their compromises, he was the one who was giving up the most . . .

“I do love her,” whispered Mantaro.

Mars sighed. He swatted away Mantaro’s hands, as he gently mopped up the tears with the ends of his handkerchief, and Mantaro – closing his eyes with a wince – instinctively leaned against the warm touch, before he nuzzled against the palm. Mars stroked at his jaw and ear with his fingers, while his thumb toyed with plump lips. Mantaro licked at his thumb. A low hiss of breath escaped Mars, who pulled his hand back and allowed it to linger between them, where it hung without purpose in the air. The handkerchief blew away in the breeze.

“You just ain’t _in _love with her,” finished Mars.

“I don’t think I am,” admitted Mantaro. “I thought I was, honestly! I remember when I first saw her and she had this beautiful smile, like it lit up the entire room, and she had the most amazing body I ever saw, but when I got to know her properly . . . _wow_! I never met anyone so smart and passionate and compassionate, and she had her flaws, sure, but she grew so much over time. I – I also fell for her confidence, but the more we’re together . . . I don’t know . . .

“It’s a few things. I guess I’m attracted to confidence, which is why I liked Rinko as the bad girl and Jacqueline as this . . . this . . . this _goddess_. The guys I’ve been around have pretty much bled confidence from their pores, which is a huge turn-on, but not arrogance . . . that just annoys me. I’d rather go for a Jade than a Kevin or a Kid. Now she’s all being soft and cuddly and gentle -?

“I don’t know, man. I feel like I want someone who doesn’t need me, as weird as that sounds, like someone who’s my equal or that can protect _me_, so I can be the one to let loose, but instead I’m always comforting her and reassuring her and holding her . . . I thought I wanted a romance, and I do, but this is like _way_ more touchy-feely than I’d want! I just . . .

“There’s times where I just feel like I’d break up, if I were anyone else, or that maybe the reason why I’m not attracted to her is just because it’s the fact we’re different . . . you know, less that she’s a woman and more that she’s just not _the_ woman, but it can’t be that, can it? I mean, if she carried her confidence on stage into the behind-the-scenes stuff, like her private life, I might _like_ her more, but would I _love_ her more? Did I just confuse like with love, too?”

Mantaro buried his face into his hands. He pressed at his eyes with his fingers, until sparks littered his vision, and – with a loud groan – dropped them hard onto Mars’ thighs, where they landed with something of a slapping sound. Mars was tall enough that his legs were on either side of Mantaro, while to see his face meant to crane his head upward. He was almost enveloped by him . . . surrounded, protected . . . tears fell afresh, as his fingers traced patterns on those firm thighs. They would trail upwards, always stopping just short of anything indecent.

The scent of cologne was a far cry from the sweet perfumes. The material of the trousers was unlike the silks and satins. A lump formed hard and painful in his throat . . . a burst of arousal, a wave of nausea . . . desire and loyalty . . . temptation . . . he slid his hands slowly away, but Mars caught them by the wrists. They were kept locked in place. Mantaro fisted them to avoid stroking at the muscles, while Mars bent low to lock eyes with him. It stole Mantaro’s breath. They were close enough that noses nearly touched, while every breath was effectively shared.

“You know, romance ain’t everything,” said Mars. “You’re good friends, right? Like, there ain’t nothing wrong with her as a person, and you do love her . . . why not just plough through? If the sex is alright, and everything else is alright, better to be content than miserable, even if you can’t be completely happy. You may as well see how things go, right?”

“Like, try to stay with her for now and work out how I feel?” Mantaro shook his head. “I’ve been thinking about that, because it’d be better to _know_ what I want than to break-up prematurely and regret it later, but . . . can I be honest? I do kind of dread the sex a lot of the time . . .”

“Wait . . . _what_? How can you dread _sex_?”

Mantaro yanked his hands back. He swung a leg around the bench; underfoot the ground crunched and crackled with his steps, above the sky had that eerie glow only ever achieved in a cityscape, and he paced back and forth . . . back and forth. A man walked by with two children in tow, who he pulled to the side and muttered something about _‘chojin_’. Mantaro ignored him. He instead pressed his hands on top of his head, with fingers knocking beneath the fin of his mask and mussing his tuft of brown hair. Mars stood and put a warm hand on his shoulder.

“That ain’t right,” said Mars.

“I know, I know!” Mantaro blinked back tears. “I remember the first night where she wanted to kiss me . . . we both sat on the couch, and we were facing each other, and she laughed like an angel, so beautiful and relaxed . . . I looked at her and I _knew_ she wanted to kiss me, but I had this kind of internal alarm bell screaming at me. I just looked away and pretended not to notice.”

“Seriously?”

“I mean, I kissed her eventually, obviously! It wasn’t always great, but I probably wasn’t great either, and I think we both learned pretty quickly, because now she does everything either ‘okay’ or ‘really freaking awesome’, and technically I should have no complaints, but . . . I just – I just can’t seem to get it up, and when we do stuff . . . it feels _wrong_ . . .

“I guess like if you were being felt up by a stranger. It doesn’t matter how great they are at sex and stuff, you’re squirming and your lip curls and your body tenses . . . you feel violated and you start counting the ceiling tiles and you just wait for it to be over . . .”

“Can I ask you a question?” Mars sighed. “You fooled around before, right?”

“Sure! I messed with guys and girls as a teenager,” said Mantaro.

“Well, Kevin once told me that he knew he was gay when the best time with a girl was still a whole lot fucking worse than his worst time with a guy . . . the girl could suck dick like a pro, and the guy could scrape his teeth on his dick or kiss like a wet fish, but the guy would still give him the tingles and get him to the edge and make him feel all relaxed.”

Mantaro stopped dead. He slowly raised his wide eyes. Mars wore a sympathetic expression, with a soft smile that failed to quite make it to his eyes, and his skin was paler than usual, as if he were the one realising a cold and devastating truth. Mantaro dropped his shoulders. He swayed where he stood, as he thought back to his time with men . . . _instant arousal, desperately clinging to the edge, panting for breath . . . parting his legs from instinct, chanting their names _. . . a craving desire sent a chill down his spine. He rubbed a hand over the base of his neck.

“I can relate to that,” whispered Mantaro.

The breeze caught at his tears, as Mars guided him back to the bench. They sat side by side in awkward silence, while Mars occasionally opened and closed his mouth in search of words, and together they looked out over the park and the sparkling lights beyond. Mars turned with a loud intake of breath. He stopped. He turned back with a furrowed brow. The actions were repeated several more times, until Mars finally swung around and straddled the bench, and waved a hand wildly in the air, as he shook his head continually and spat out in a high-pitched voice:

“Is it good at all?”

“It’s not _bad_,” muttered Mantaro. “I just really, really, _really_ don’t like . . . you know . . . _vaginas_. I mean, they’re kind of icky, aren’t they? Like a bulldog eating mayonnaise. I hate anything to do with that part, and sometimes I feel . . . I feel like I could penetrate her, but then everything just dies and stops working and I lose all arousal. I shouldn’t feel that way.”

“Nah, not as a straight man, anyway.”

“But then she has the most _amazing_ rack! I’ll admit that they’re totally fun to play with and kiss and suckle, and then she makes the most delicious sounds, so you could lose yourself in them, and there’s nothing more feminine that breasts, right? They’re so perfectly round and white and soft, and I can’t get enough of them. I’m just confused! How can I like one bit, but not the other?”

“It could just be a preference thing?” Mars furrowed his brow. “I don’t know if the bastard was joking or not, but Kevin once told me that gay men _love_ boobs . . . he’s a boob man, too! I mean, if you weren’t in a relationship, I would just say ‘get around, see what you do and don’t like’.”

“But I _am_ in a relationship,” said Mantaro. “So what do I do?”

Mars gripped Mantaro by the upper arms. He spun him around, forcing him to quickly throw his legs on either side of the bench, and his firm grip restrained his movement . . . kept him in place . . . _his member twitched, his body tingled. _There was something about not having to be strong for a change, about being protected and relinquishing control, and the freedom – the total _freedom_ – from someone else calling the shots. Mantaro squirmed. He bit into his lip and shifted from side to side, while he looked up into those dark eyes with blown pupils.

“You can’t spend the next sixty years feeling incomplete,” said Mars. “Ain’t it better to be alone than to be with someone not right for you? I mean, you always seemed so into women, so how’d you not notice the fact that you might be _gay_? How’s that even work?”

“Well, I always knew I preferred guys.” Mantaro blushed. “I guess it should have been a sign, as I’d exclusively fantasise about them in sexual situations, but equally . . . I was curious about girls and I wanted to see them and I did get aroused when they were super hot. I mean, I guess it could have been hormones? It died off the older I got, and I fooled around with one once . . .

“I was able to do a lot with her, and I got her off, but I couldn’t get it up and she couldn’t do anything back and afterwards -? It was a feeling like ‘well, got this out my system’. I just assumed maybe it was the alcohol why I couldn’t get aroused, though.”

“But it wasn’t,” finished Mars.

“I don’t think so, no. I guess . . . I guess I really do admire women, and I can be in awe of them, but it’s like looking at a perfect marble statue, Mars. I can look at a statue and feel like I’m looking through the eyes of God at true beauty, but I sure as heck don’t want to bang the statue, no matter how beautiful it is! I also knew I wasn’t repulsed by the idea of being with women, and I could be with them if I needed to be with them, so I was straight or bisexual, right?”

Mars loosened his hold, as he shook his head. The sigh that escaped his lips spoke of pity, but his hands ran slowly upwards to Mantaro’s shoulders and neck, where they dug into the tense muscles and worked at them with an expert massage . . . _it felt so good_. It worked at the knots and soft fingertips brushed at his bare skin, and it was nothing like when Jacqueline attempted a ‘massage’, instead he leaned back into the touch and closed his eyes . . . he wanted more. He licked at his lips. Mars chucked and leaned closer into him, blocking out all light.

“I think society is way too focussed on straight people,” said Mars. “It’s also messed up like people treat being gay like it’s gross, and they overcompensate to make it obvious they’re straight, because they don’t wanna be associated with gay people, you know? So we all start thinking ‘hey, to not be attracted to someone means to be repulsed by them’. It ain’t the case, because the fact is to not be attracted to someone just means to be indifferent to them.”

“So what’re you saying?”

“I’m saying that you probably thought ‘I ain’t repulsed by chicks, so I must like them’. You probably also had a crap-ton of hormones, when anything remotely linked to sex gets you curious and horny, so you confused correlation with causation . . . it ain’t the women you were attracted to, but just the idea of sex and someone touching your dick. That’s all.”

Mantaro nibbled on his lip. He placed his hands on the crooks of Mars’ arms, before he traced slow patterns along his forearms to the hands that worked at his shoulders, and – entwining their fingers – he brought them to his lips, where he placed soft kisses to each of the rough knuckles. A low groan slipped from Mars’ throat. It slowly turned into a guttural growl, as Mars leaned forward and pushed Mantaro flush down against the stone bench.

The warmth of his body sent shivers through Mantaro, as Mars planted a hand on either side of Mantaro’s head, and – with one leg on the ground – his knee forced apart Mantaro’s legs and worked its way between his thighs, until it lightly pressed against a growing erection. Mantaro yelped. He threw back his head and exposed his neck, while his arms fell back and rested seductively stretched high above him. Mars grabbed his wrists and locked them together.

“So what do I do now?” Mantaro asked.

“If I were you, I’d leave her and find a guy.”

“But no one will want me!” Mantaro flinched. “I know that she could have anyone she wanted, but I’m just this loser with an ugly mask and failing grades and a personality that puts even my friends off . . . they’re all going on with their lives and having kids and with great careers, too! I can only wait for my parents to croak it and offer her what’s left to me.”

“You could just be alone, you know,” said Mars.

“I don’t want to _be_ alone! I want -! I want -! I want a family . . . I want children that I can worship and adore and fuss over, and that’ll look after me when I’m old, and I want a friend who’ll live with me and won’t leave me and who I can depend on. I do love her . . . she makes me smile and laugh, she gives me hope and inspires me to be a better person . . .”

“So do your friends. That’s what you want, isn’t it? You want her to be your friend, and to live together and have kids and for there to be no sex . . . no romance . . . that might suit you, but you really expect her to sacrifice a sex life and romantic life to be a roommate?”

“I know it’s unfair, but –”

“You can’t ask that of someone just ‘cause you don’t want to come out the closet!”

Mars curled his lip. He made to pull away, with his grip already loosening on Mantaro. Time went in slow-motion . . . _the knee slipping away from his crotch, the loss of warmth on his lips, the lack of hard muscles holding him in check . . . _Mantaro gasped out a ‘no’. He threw hand around Mars’ shoulder. He yanked back. Mars fell downward, with only his forearms to support him, and Mantaro stole the only opportunity available . . . _he kissed him_. It was a mere pressing of their lips lightly together, but it stole his breath away and brought him to full erection.

“It’d break her heart if I leave her,” whispered Mantaro.

“It’s breaking her heart with you staying.”

This time, Mars kiss him. It was furious and passionate, with Mars completely dominating the kiss and sliding his tongue deep inside, as he explored every part of the eager mouth, and – as Mantaro mewled – Mars yanked apart his legs wide. Mars settled between them. A series of cries and moans escaped Mantaro, as he wrapped his legs around a firm and muscular waist, while he pulled Mars flush against him and ground against his growing member. Mars gasped out:

“So why’d you call me here, Mantaro?”

Mantaro pulled him back into the kiss . . . _no clashing of teeth, no biting painfully on his lip . . . no constant slurping noises . . . _his legs tightened until he worried about bruising those hips, as he forced their erections together with a spark of excitement. He ran his hands over Mars’ back, desperate to explore every inch of skin through his suit. He wanted to memorise the muscles, the curves, the warmth . . . his moans were barely stifled by the kiss, as his tongue battled with Mars’, until he pulled back with heaving gulps of oxygen. Tears streamed down to his ears.

“I don’t want to betray her.” Mantaro let out a shuddered breath. “I just . . . I _need_ to know if I really am gay, so I know how I can go forward! I also – I also have needs. I’m fed up of always being left with no arousal or left on the edge, and I’m fed up of only having my own hand for company, and I just want . . . for once . . . to know what it feels like . . . to feel _complete_.”

“And if she finds out? This is a fucking betrayal, Mantaro.”

“It’s something I’d never usually do. I turned down one girl, ‘cause she was into ‘compensated dating’, and I absolutely _hate_ cheaters, but . . . I don’t know . . . maybe I will feel guilty, and maybe I won’t be able to live with that guilt, but I need to know . . .”

A loud cough echoed behind them. They both turned their heads to see a young woman walking her dog along the footpath, as she glared at them and gestured wildly for them to leave, and – with a chuckle – Mars slid his hand slowly and seductively down Mantaro’s chest. He went lower . . . _lower_ . . . Mantaro heard nothing but his racing heart. It pounded louder and louder in his ears, until it blocked out all other sounds, and then – with a firm grip – Mars grasped at his erection and palmed it with an expert touch. Mantaro cried.

The sound of absolute pleasure earned a scoff from the woman, who darted away with complaints in a language Mantaro failed to comprehend, but there was no time to process her words . . . Mars grabbed Mantaro by his wrist. He was dragged from the bench. Mantaro stumbled over his feet, as he was forced into the woodland just behind the bench, and thrown roughly against the back of a tree. Mars bit and sucked at his neck, until he growled out:

“If you want to fool around, break up with her.”

“I _can’t_,” pleaded Mantaro.

“So what happens if you go ahead with this?”

Mars wrenched up Mantaro’s top. He pulled it high, but stopped just underneath his armpits. It was a weird mixture of exposure and concealment, as the material bunched around his upper body, but it also exposed his nipples . . . they hardened in the cold night. Mars descended on one with his lips perfectly pressed around the nub, as he suckled and rapidly flicked his tongue over the sensitive end. A free hand tweaked and tugged at the other nipple, until Mantaro was forced to cover his mouth with both hands to hold back constant sounds . . . _‘uh, uh, oh, ah, uh’_ . . .

“What happens if you like _this_?” Mars bit at the nipple. “You going to go the rest of your life without the one thing that you know does it for you? Or you going to be ‘that guy’ who fucking cheats on a faithful and supportive wife, while she does nothing to deserve your shit?”

“I don’t know. I don’t know, Mars. Please, I just need . . .”

“I know what you need. I’ve had guys like you before . . . it only ever ends one of two ways, Mantaro. They either sneak out once a week to fuck around with a guy on the side, sometimes randoms or prostitutes, just so they can get the release they need . . . or they spend a lifetime in a celibate relationship silently screaming inside. It’s a slippery slope.”

Mars returned to sucking at his nipples, while Mantaro buried his hands deep into those silky red locks of hair and pulled him so close to his chest that Mars struggled to breathe. A pair of hands fought with his belt. Mantaro barely realised it was slipped through the hooks of his trousers, until he was spun around and shoved hard against rough bark. There followed a belt slapping hard against his clothed buttocks. He muffled a scream with his hands. The pain was delicious, merging with the pleasure and arousal, while he knew Mars had complete and utter control.

The belt struck twice . . . _thrice_ . . . Mars growled. Mantaro panted for breath, while he rolled his hips against the tree and looked out to the lookout spot, where a pair of policemen paused as if in search of the men rumoured to have been committing indecent exposure. He barely noticed the belt wrapping around the tree, until his hands were slammed high above his head and strapped against the bark. He was defenceless. He was at Mars’ mercy.

“I know what I want,” swore Mantaro.

“Which isn’t Jacqueline . . .”

Tears streamed down Mantaro’s cheeks. He screwed shut his eyes . . . _she would be waiting at home for him, where she would be celibate and faithful, and here he was about to be fucked out of his brains by a mere acquaintance . . . _Mantaro whispered out ‘_please’_ like a mantra. He bucked back into Mars, who scrambled to yank down his trousers, and soon they bunched around his knees and kept him rooted to the spot. The erection sprang free in the cold air.

“It isn’t Jacqueline,” whispered Mantaro.

Mars laughed against his ear, while his hand came around to grab his length. Mantaro gasped. He threw back his head and rested it on the broad shoulder, while he rocked as much into the hand as the tree would allow, and Mars continued to kiss at his neck. A thumb dipped into the slit of the flared head, while rough fingers held just right around the foreskin, and Mars milked him with the perfect grip, as he muttered ‘_like silk around steel’_. Mantaro scratched at the bark.

The police muttered something between themselves, before they walked away. Mantaro mewled, while a sweat broke over his flesh, and the bunched material around knees and armpits stuck against his skin, as he writhed and moaned. A rustle of fabric followed. Mantaro tried to crane his head to see behind him, but he only knew what was happening when something hot and soft and smooth pushed its way between his buttocks . . . _Mars was hard and nestled between his cheeks_! It was so erotic that Mantaro nearly came. A spark of pleasure burst forth.

It struck every nerve, while colours danced about his vision. He choked on his breath. He instinctively clenched his inner walls and buttocks, desperately in search of closer contact, and he bucked and writhed and panted, as his member wept with pre-come. The natural lubrication came out like a stream, coating Mars’ fingers and making his jerking hand movements all the easier, and Mars whispered dirty things into his ear . . . _‘I bet it tastes good’, ‘you wet for me?’, ‘you’re a proper fucking whore, ain’t ya?’_ . . . Mantaro sobbed in need.

Mars pulled back, so that his member parted from the buttocks. Mantaro wept ‘_no’ _over and over in a broken voice, as he thrust back in search of the hard cock, until – with a chuckle – Mars spanked him hard and spat out: _‘shut the fuck up, bitch_’. He stilled. A shuffle of fabric indicated Mars was fiddling around in his pocket . . . Mantaro heard a loud click. There was the heavy scent of cinnamon. A squirting noise followed, like something coming out of a long tube . . .

It was soon clear what was planned.

The hand on his erection came away, before it parted his buttocks. The cool breeze brushed against his winking hole, while a wet finger traced around the edges, and slowly – doing something he had only ever done to himself – it slid inside . . . _it slid inside. _Mars murmured for him to stay relaxed, but Mantaro was in heaven. The finger followed his natural curve, lighting brushing against each and every internal ridge, until it fitted in easily to the final knuckle.

“Mantaro,” growled Mars. “You got t’ keep quiet, we’re in public.”

Mantaro cried. He let loose a constant series of sounds and half-formed words, while he bucked back and thrust against the finger now deep inside of him, and – as he pleaded and blubbered and begged – a second finger slid in alongside the first . . . _no resistance. _They made a scissoring motion and moved slowly in and out, in and out, while Mars continued to name-call and tease and nibble his earlobe . . . _‘you like that, you little bitch?’ _. . . 

The third finger was a little harder to take, enough that Mantaro had to beg for a break, as his inner walls contracted around the invading digits. Mantaro soon writhed and bucked back, while he tried to crane back his head to see how he looked . . . half-dressed and tied to a tree in public, while a man twice his size whispered dirty and obscene things in his ear . . . _‘I really can’t wait to rape this ass’, ‘you’re going to scream in ecstasy when I make you come’ _. . . Mantaro wept with arousal and desire, while he clenched and drooled and begged for more. Mars paused.

“It ain’t cheating yet,” said Mars.

“If she wouldn’t agree to it, then it’s cheating.”

“Okay, well, what I’m saying is –” Mars jabbed at his prostate. “This is the point of no fucking return, as I’m about to take your assginity and pound you until you can’t walk. You want to back out? Now is the fucking time to do it, before I dump a load of come into you.”

“You all talk? Stop gossiping and just fuck me, Mars!”

Mars laughed. He pressed again at the prostate. Mantaro screamed out, until a hand slapped itself around his mouth and pressed tight. It muffled the sound, as his legs trembled and eyes rolled back, and pleasure unlike anything he ever knew burst through him, until every inch of him was alive with tingling desire. He fucked himself in earnest on those fingers, even as Mars added a fourth, and soon the squelching sound of lubricant flooded the woodland.

A group of teenagers walked past the lookout, still in their uniforms. Mars licked a long line from the collarbone of Mantaro and along the throbbing vein of his neck, and he stopped only at his earlobe, which he suckled and nibbled and followed with a soft blow inside. He removed his hand. Mantaro screamed out a choked _‘holy fuck, Mars’_! The boys in the clearing laughed and cheered, while one shouted something that sounded obscene, but soon they wandered off and left Mantaro feeling dirty . . . wanted . . . needed . . . _sexual_. Mantaro mewled.

Mars slid his fingers out from the now gaping hole. A trickle of lubrication slid down his inner thigh, while Mantaro fought and tugged against his restraints, and he had never been more exposed and yet never felt more natural . . . _safe_. Mars gripped at his hips. The long fingers bruised at the exposed skin, while the erection – seemingly thick and long – slid between Mantaro’s cheeks . . . occasionally the head would catch against his winking hole . . .

“Remember, you asked for this . . .”

A hand came away. Mars shuffled on his feet. Then it came . . .

The head pressed against his hole. It was hold and smooth, like nothing he could describe, but it was the perfect size for him . . . like his body was _made_ for this one act . . . a momentary ache – close to pain, but not quite – came as the head pushed forward. It was the hardest part to take, as the flared head stretched him more than he imagined. Mantaro choked on saliva. The member slid slowly inside him, moving inch by inch, with a mixture of burning friction and pleasure.

Mantaro arched his back, as it went further and further inside. It never seemed to stop. Onward it went until his body was stretched to breaking point, but the sensations . . . _oh god, the sensations _. . . how could he describe being filled? He flexed his inner muscles, as red pubic hair scratched against his buttocks, and this . . . _this was heaven_! The member was thick inside. It was like a part of him . . . completing him . . . it was nothing like a mouth or vagina, nothing like the fingers or toys . . . this was real and warm and designed to hit the right spots.

Mars paused. He panted against Mantaro’s ear, while one arm wrapped around his waist, and his other arm . . . his hand . . . it wrapped around Mantaro’s weeping erection, where he held it with a firm and yet still hold. They both collected their breath. They held back from thrusting lest either come too early. Mars whispered the first nice thing in his ear . . . _‘you’re perfect’ _. . . _‘you feel so good from the inside’ _. . . Mars slowly pulled out. He thrust back in.

Mantaro screamed.

The hand on his member jerked in time to the thrusts. Mars went hard and fast, nothing like the two extremes of ‘barely felt’ or ‘extreme pain’ of Jacqueline, and instead it was just the right amount of force, as the flared head perfectly struck his prostate with every blow. Each thrust brought with it masculine grunts, along with slapping of balls upon buttocks. The lubrication squelched out along with the pre-come and dripped onto his trousers.

Mars pounded hard into him. He left a trail of bite-marks on his neck. It would be hard to explain, but – _holy fuck_ – Mantaro could not bring himself to care . . . it was too good! He thrust back as much as possible, while Mars jerked his erection and another hand tweaked at his nipple, and the pleasure circulated his body until it threatened to reach bursting point. It rolled higher and higher, as his dick twitched and squirted and prepared for orgasm, and his sounds finally stopped, as his voice ceased to be capable of any and all speech. Mars grunted and groaned against him.

“You’re fucking perfect, Mantaro,” gasped Mars. “My little slut.”

It was too much! No one ever spoke dirty to him before . . . used him, spanked him, tied him . . . every inch of skin buzzed and tingled, while sweat dripped down into the small of his back, and all other sounds disappeared, as the only sound left was that of Mars chanting out _‘fuck, you’re fucking good . . . so fucking good’_! Mars went faster and faster, while he alternated between playing with nipples and spanking his butt cheek . . . spanking, slapping . . . handprints left against pale skin, as Mantaro sobbed and wept against the bark of the tree, desperate for more.

Finally, it burst forth. He screamed again. The explosion of ecstasy was more than he could bear, as he clawed at the tree and thrust hard back against Mars, and – with inner walls gripping with a death-like vice – his member sent ropes and ropes of come splattering against the tree, where it dripped down silver in the moonlight. Mars thrust four, five . . . _six_ . . . more times. He stilled balls deep inside Mantaro, as he came inside him and flooded him with come.

A complete sense of bliss swept over Mantaro . . . _his first ever orgasm outside of his hand _. . . every panted breath brought him slowly to reality, as the afterglow brought murmurs and sighs and hums of pure contentment. He dropped and sagged against the belt, that was now the only thing holding him upright, and it dug into his wrists until it left cuts and welts alongside the bruises. Mars pulled out. The come flooded out with lubrication and sweat, but it was somehow erotic . . . a reminder of Mars’ masculinity and dominance. Mantaro mewled.

“You’re beautiful, Mantaro. I could love a guy like you.”

“I could love a guy like you, too,” whispered Mantaro.

Mars undid the tie. It dropped fast the floor. Mars barely had time to catch Mantaro, as he collapsed in turn, and – together – they carefully dropped onto the dew-stained grass. They held each other in the cool breeze, surrounded by trees and shrubbery. It was the first time that Mantaro could see Mars . . . still dressed in a now creased and sweat-stained suit, his rapidly deflating member lay exposed from his open fly, and Mantaro gasped. It was hard to believe that fit so perfectly inside him. The girth and length impressive even when wet and soft.

They panted and laughed and lay together, while Mars took his hands and kissed at his wrists with surprisingly gentle and lingering pecks . . . massaging blood back into circulation. It was the kind of aftercare that he had far from expected, as Mars whispered how beautiful he looked and how perfect he had been and asked whether he needed anything . . . affectionate, kind, patient . . . Mantaro closed his eyes with a smile, as he nuzzled against Mars.

“We ought to get going before we get caught,” gasped Mars.

Mantaro shook his head. He pushed Mars onto his back, before he kicked off his trousers and climbed astride him, and – finally able to make use of his hands – he ran his fingers over that broad chest and defined abdominal muscles. Mantaro locked eyes with Mars, before he slid down, down . . . _down_ . . . until he was stretched out with his mouth hovering just over an erection that started to come back to life with a refractory period that only a chojin could experience. Mantaro lightly licked at the head. A salty taste far unlike Jacqueline . . .

“I’ve wanted this for years,” confessed Mantaro. “I’ve never got to come before . . . never got to feel that good, never got some tended to all my – my – my . . . _you know_ . . . kinks.” Mantaro blushed. “I feel like I’ve got a whole decade to make up for! I don’t just want more, I want –”

“_Everything_,” finished Mars. “You want everything.”

Mars parted his legs and laughed. It put his growing member on prominent display, enough that Mantaro gave into temptation and licked a long line from base to head, as he followed the throbbing vein along the underside with his tongue. He lapped several times, as low moans escaped him. He paused at the head. Mars bucked upward with a cry, while Mantaro suckled at the head and flicked rapidly at the slit with the tip of his tongue, before he circled the head under the rim with cries that sent vibrations deep down Mars’ cock. He pulled back with a gasp.

“I want it all,” panted Mantaro.

“_Then take it _. . .”

Mantaro licked his lips, as he devoured the cock to its base . . .


End file.
